Measure your Pressure

Have you ever felt pressured to be yourself? You would think that because you are you, it’s easy to be you but sometimes it’s just not the case.
I don’t know about the rest of you but I get fucking tired and sometimes I just want a break from being me and to just sleep for a really long time. Sometimes I feel pressure from other people to continue being me and with being Alice, there are things that people expect me to do and be…
I’m on a journey to love myself and to learn self-love and with learning forgiveness and learning how to forgive myself, the next step is to learn how to handle the pressure of being me.

The pressure to be consistent sometimes is nuts! What I am trying to say is that, because of who I am, I am expected by my family and friends to always be happy-go-lucky Alice, who has an answer to every single situation, I am expected to be a therapist to my loved ones and always bring the positive energy. Now don’t get me wrong, I am those things and I love being someone who my loved ones can rely on but there are times when I want a break, I do feel like I’m not allowed to be any different and I feel pressure to keep up that appearance! I’m not always going to be happy-go-lucky, I’m not always going to know the right things to say/do and I won’t always want to be THAT Alice.
Like most people, I have layers and levels to me that are different, my personality is right in the middle, I love to go out, party, dance and be out and about but on the other hand I love to be indoors reading a book with a cup of tea, all by myself with no one bothering me.

We place so much pressure on ourselves and we don’t even know it! We don’t know it because the pressure is silent and its one of those things that build’s up slowly. We all feel like we have to keep up an appearance, that we have to be okay all the time and when we put on that mask it gets harder and harder to take off.
Nobody knows the real us, they know the image that we like to put out to the world, the mask that we have carefully painted so that no one asks us any personal questions that we don’t want to answer. But the real question is, why do we paint our image? Instead of just being real and enjoy our lives? It would be so much easier to take that pressure of having to pretend to be something that we are not and just be real, to just admit when we are not okay, to say no when we don’t want to go or do something.
Life would be so much more enjoyable and easier if we were to just stop and do what we truly want to do.

At the same time, we all need to realise that just because someone smiles and says they are okay, doesn’t mean that they are actually okay. We use the question “Are you okay?” as a conversation starter, as another way of saying hello and we avoid asking if a person is really okay because we don’t have the time to listen to others’ problems, as we have problems of our own!
We avoid asking people if they are okay and we avoid getting asked questions we don’t want to answer. It’s a vicious circle that just goes on and on.

We are going to have pressure no matter what we do, there are burdens that come with being blessed, being yourself, being great. There is pressure in age, whether you’re 10, 18, 21 or 39. There is pressure in life!
It’s easy for me to say that we need to be real but the truth of the matter is, it is scary to be real in front of people because we don’t know who to trust! We don’t know who the snakes are amongst us so we keep the mask on and we continue to hide our faces. When we feel like we can’t trust anyone, can’t open up to anyone we begin to counsel ourselves which doesn’t make any fucking sense whatsoever! The one that is going crazy is counselling themselves?!

I will always scream how important your environment is and who you surround yourself with because the people who you are around you are the ones you should be able to confide in, to tell all your worries and cares to. No matter how much pressure I have, I know I have people I can be real around, I can be my true self and I know they support me.

“Diamonds are made under pressure”

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